There are clothes that only look good on models and mannequins. Unstructued flouncy dresses and suits that only work if you’ve spent four hours a day at the gym, eat only boiled chicken, or are made out of resin.

They look amazing on them. On actual human beings? Not so much. These outfits seems designed to highlight that piece of cake we ate on our birthday three years ago. On me, they look like a sack of angry hamsters, nothing but roving lumps and bumps.

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